CALLS YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT

Hello, Mr. Jones? This the Benton Public Library calling. Our records show that your daughter has checked out 17 books four months ago and has not returned them. If they are lost or damaged, the replacement cost for those books is.......

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Mr. Jones, Sylvia from Dr. Deacon's office. Good news. It's definitely twins. Doctor is so pleased and we know you are, too...........

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Hi, Bill. It's Joe. You know, from the garage. Well, the damage is a little worse than we thought. You'll need a new carburetor, and a little transmission work before this buggy is ready to roll again......

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Hi, Dad, it's Pete! I'm on I-75 just north of Tampa, and my car broke down. I'm out of money, Dad, and I thought maybe you could...........

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Bill, just put the roast in the oven, slice the mushrooms, crush the garlic, and peel a few potatoes. It isn't as if I'm asking you to fly to the moon. I'm tied up here for a few more hours and......

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Hello, Mr. Jones? Sgt. Haney from the Benton Police Department. We have your son, Billy, here, and he says he had no part in the school cafeteria vandalism, but......

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Dad, it's Margie! We've eloped, Dad! Yes, we're man and wife. We're so happy! Rooster says hello. Oh, you know him, don't be silly. Yes, he has tattoos. Yes, he has long hair. Well, he plans on getting a job soon, so your attitude is completely..........

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Hello, Mr. Jones. This is the Bless America Salute the Flag Support the Troops Save the Whales Foundation and we know you are interested in cleaning up our media, so perhaps a small donation would..........

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Hello, Mr. Jones, this is the Benton Bank calling. How are you today? We have not yet received notice of your insurance payment and, as you know, one of the requirements of your loan is that it must be adequately insured. If we do not receive this notice, we will be forced to........

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He what? Now just stop crying and talk to me. He got drunk and hit you? You're in a motel room in Cinncinnati? Now, Margie, I told you this Rooster wasn't the man you thought he was. You just sit tight and I'lll...............

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Hello, Mr. Jones. Benton Air Conditioning Sales and Repair. I'm calling to let you know there may be a delay on our service, because of the high number of calls in this 95 degree heat wave. We'll try to get to you as quickly as possible...........

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Mr. Jones? Mrs. Harkin, Billy's English teacher. I'm afraid the news isn't good. Billy has not read The Tale of Two Cities nor did his book report. He takes no interest in our discussion of fine literature and his grammar leaves a lot to be desired. I'm afraid he will need summer school to catch up with the other students.............

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Mr. Jones? This is Flossie! Is Pete there? Could I speak to him? I really need to talk to him, Mr. Jones, because we have a problem. I think I'm pregnant. So, could you tell him to call me as soon as...........

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Bill, Joe again. It's worse than I thought. We'll have to replace that transmission after all. I'm afraid this is going to run you a little more than you thought.............

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Mrs. Jones? This is Dr. Smithers. I'm happy to report that your husband is doing much better. His blood pressure is high, but I think we can get that under control, but the chest pains indicate a certain amount of stress.........